Valm Silicone Based Personal Lubricant - Ultra Long Lasting - Sex Lube for Women, Men, and Couples - 8.5 Ounce Pump

This stuff is fantastic and lasts a long time, but use caution. I bought this while planning a night of hanky panky with my wonderful wife, so on the night in question, I lubed her up and jumped on. I then slid down the other side and onto the floor. That wouldn't have been so bad if it hadn't been for the fact that I had landed on my pit bull. He awoke thinking he was being attacked by a massive anaconda with only one eye. As a result, he did what dogs do when they are attacked. He clung to that massive beast, causing me to scream, which prompted him to begin swinging it around in an attempt to kill it. He made me pass out, and I assume that's when he let go and grabbed my scrotum, destroying one nut and letting the other out of the bag. My wife eventually reached the light switch. Our pit Angel baby had already fled and hid, and all my wife knew was that I had been attacked and that our brave angel baby had chased away a crazed lunatic who had attempted to castrate her husband. So, needless to say, I awoke to a paramedic on the phone discussing how to approach an escaped testicle and an officer asking who I had pissed off to the point where they wanted to remove my garbage. They loaded me onto a stretcher and drove me to the hospital to be stitched up. My wife stated that she would be there as soon as she had washed off all of the sex lube. After we got home a few hours later, I decided to take a shower. As soon as I stepped into the sex lube-coated shower, my feet slid out from under me, and I landed on my head, cold. I awoke to the same paramedic on the phone, explaining that the man who had his penis nearly severed by a lunatic had just been hit in the head while showering, and the same police officer saying, "boy you sure pissed off someone didn't you?" "br>I only get action once a year, and this year was especially exciting, but I can tell you that this lube lasts a long time when you have to tickle your own pickle, if you know what I mean. " Although, in hindsight, I would recommend waiting if your trouser snake has stitches because tearing a stitch can be quite painful and messy. br>The good news is that the doctor says I should be fully recovered by next year's hanky panky session; for now, I'll just have to admire the swelling. What can I say, luck has always been on my side; I guess I was just born lucky. br>So have fun and, for Pete's sake, be careful.

Makayla CHAMBERLAIN

| Jun 23, 2021

The addition of the bottle pump is the cherry on top. I've tried a lot of lubes in my search for nirvana, and I've written reviews for a few of them. I usually compare them to my previous favorite silicone lube (Wet Platinum), but they always fall short; I was hoping that Lush Silicone-based lube would do the same, but I prefer this lube. If you're unfamiliar with silicone-based lubes, they last much longer than water-based lubes and don't need to be reapplied once they've dried out. Silicone is also water resistant, so use your imagination to come up with new ideas. They don't usually get sticky, but a couple of them have. This lube has a slightly thicker viscosity than my previous favorite, and it didn't get sticky - The best of both worlds is what you get when you combine the two. It was extremely enjoyable for both my wife and me. It is tasteless and odorless, making it ideal for all applications except toy play with silicone toys. This is true of any silicone-based product. With those, use a water-based lube. This lube is the best I've ever used; It's just as good as, if not better than, anything else I've tried. Lush has proven to be a successful company. br>The bottle and pump are what really stand out. It's worth noting. worthy. With other silicone lubes, I've had my fair share of spills, drips, and mishaps. It's not necessary to use a lot of it, and it's always been difficult to avoid getting too much of it. While being stored, I even had one bottle completely empty. It's a complete disaster! In addition, the bottle is usually lube-covered and difficult to grip. The Lush bottle, on the other hand, has a great locking pump top. With one or two pumps, I can get exactly the amount I need, and then I can twist the pump top slightly to lock it. SO EASY TO USE. My only suggestion is that Lush develop a non-slip bottle, but silicone makes everything slippery, so be careful not to spill it on your floor. In the future, I will purchase this lube. It has quickly become one of my favorites. br>If you found my review helpful, please rate it as such below.

Astrid York

| Jul 27, 2021

So, if you've been disappointed by water-based lubes (and honestly, if you haven't, I'm not sure I'd believe you've ever tried one), you must try this. As another reviewer suggested, I think using this in conjunction with a water-based lube is worth a shot. It only takes a little to make a big difference. What I couldn't completely wash away with a quick rinse seemed to hydrate rather than make me feel sticky or gross. It's latex-safe, so forget what you learned in sex education about using only water-based lubricants. I think the pump is a great idea because it prevents spills, and I can't imagine spilling a lot of this and having to clean it up, but I also don't want to live without it, so thank you for the bottle design. Only in the dark did it become difficult, but where there is a will, there is a way.

Jones Buchanan

| Apr 02, 2021

We've tried a lot of lubes, and none of them have made us happier than Valm. This is the most luxurious of all lubricants, and the price is so low that we purchased two bottles! We've even told our friends about this product. This lube is well worth your money, ladies and gentlemen.

Carter Hansen

| Nov 11, 2021

The best on the market by a long shot. I used I. They seemed to switch their formula for years, and even their velvet is draggy and gritty now. You could drive a semi-truck through a donut with this stuff.

Lana Raymond

| Oct 01, 2021